If you see your teen using the term “lala bop” on social media or in a message, be warned that this online slang isn’t as innocent as it may sound.
Parents are likely unfamiliar with the seemingly innocuous term, leaving many caretakers to ask: What does “lala bop” mean?
“It’s used to bully and slut-shame,” Titania Jordan, chief parenting officer for Bark Technologies, a company that creates internet safety products, tells TODAY.com. “It’s used to ‘call out,’ whether true or not, ‘body count’ — meaning how many people somebody has ‘hooked up’ with or slept with.”
Jordan says the term originated from a 2021 song titled “Lala Bop” by rapper Almighty Rexxo, which features explicit, sexual language.
“Lala Bop” has appeared primarily in online posts on TikTok and X, formerly known as Twitter. It is also being discussed by concerned parents on Facebook and Instagram, some of whom have shared notices from their children’s schools warning caregivers that the term is being used to bully students.
Now, when users attempt to search for posts that include “lala bop” on TikTok, they are offered “no results” and are instead served with a content warning.
“This phrase may be associated with behavior or content that violates our guidelines,” the content warning reads. “Promoting a safe and positive experience is TikTok’s top priority. For more information, we invite you to review our Community Guidelines.”
TODAY.com reached out to TikTok, but they declined to provide a comment. The video-sharing platform has policies against harassment and bullying and removes content that promotes bullying; TikTok also offers a slate of support resources and tools for parents.
TODAY.com also reached out to X for comment. Press requests receive an automatic message: “Busy now, please check back later.” No additional response or comment was provided to TODAY.com by a spokesperson for the company.
What is slut-shaming?
“Slut-shaming (is) a form of bullying that criticizes one’s actual or assumed sexual behavior,” Dawn Bounds, a psychiatrist-mental health nurse practitioner and assistant professor at the University of California, Irvine, tells TODAY.com.
According to Jordan, social media apps and emojis have made it possible for teens to slut-shame their peers in a variety of ways that may not be obvious to parents.
“Those of us who grew up before smartphones experienced rumors flying around middle school and high school,” Jordan says. “It’s now compounded, and the negative effects are exponential and forever-lasting.”
One 2021 study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health found that slut-shaming is “gender-base violence” used primarily against young girls and women, and can cause psychological and physical health problems.
The same study of over 600 girls between the ages of 10 and 18 found that 14% of participants had experienced sex-shaming at least once.
Jordan says parents may not even be familiar with the slang kids use to slut-shame, “like ‘smash’ (casual sex) or ‘thirsty’ (desperate for sexual attention).”
“It’s not just words and letters — it’s emojis, too,” Jordan adds, referring to various food items used to represent sexual acts or body parts.
“The first thing to do is to accept the fact that if you’re a parent, you’re now old and you’re not cool,” Jordan says. “You might think you know all the terms, but you don’t. Every day there are new things coming up that are not what they sound like. ‘Lala Bop’ sounds like a cute kid’s cartoon.”
How has the meaning of “lala bop” evolved?
While “lala bop” was first used to slut-shame others, Jordan says the term has now evolved “beyond sexual encounters, real and perceived” to include “overeating and really any other activity that might embarrass someone.”
Jordan says she has seen instances in which “lala bop” was used to shame someone who was diagnosed autistic and someone with what others assume to be an eating disorder.
“It’s pretty heartbreaking,” Jordan…
Read More: What does ‘lala bop’ mean? What parents need to know to protect, inform their kids